Monday, July 14, 2014 – 8:00 a.m.

An intoxicated John Reagle was arrested on July 13, 2014, at Duffy’s Bar & Grill after claiming to have a severed human hand and harassing other patrons with it.

After Mr. Reagle spent the night sobering up in a YCSD jail cell, Detectives Armstrong and Murphy interviewed him early the next morning at the Yoknapatawpha County Sheriff’s Department.

Participants:

• Detective T. Armstrong
• Detective S. Murphy
• John Reagle

Detective Murphy: Good morning, Mr. Reagle. Do you know why you’re here?

John Reagle: Yes, ma’am, I think I do.

Detective Murphy: You’ve been advised of your rights. Do you understand them?

John Reagle: Yes, ma’am.

Detective Murphy: Good. Do you wish to have an attorney present during questioning?

John Reagle: No. I don’t think I need one. I didn’t do anything.

Detective Murphy: Fine. Let’s get started. Would you state your full name and address for me, please?

John Reagle: My name is John Reagle, and I live at 522 CR 418, Oxford. Can I have a drink of water, please?

Detective Murphy: Sure. Last night, you had a human hand in a container at Duffy’s bar. Do you remember that?

John Reagle: A hand! Are you sure? I thought that was a root. How would a hand get on my farm?

Detective Murphy: That’s what we’d like to know.

Detective Armstrong: Didn’t it seem rather odd to you that it had a bad smell?

John Reagle: Not really. I’ve come across some really smelly roots since I’ve been farming, especially when I’m cultivating. I try to get that done before the heat of the day, in the morning. It never dawned on me that it would be a hand. I was drinking all day. What can I say?

Detective Murphy: Do you always drink while you’re working?

Detective Armstrong: That’s a pretty bad habit, considering the machines you use.

John Reagle: No, I don’t always drink while I work. Look, I saw it after I finished cultivating the crop because of its odd shape. I dug it out and put it in a plastic container, you know, for the effect. I thought it would be funny to take it to Duffy’s. You know, a practical joke.

Detective Murphy: So you found this so-called root the same day you brought it to Duffy’s?

John Reagle: Yeah.

Detective Armstrong: You never saw it before then?

John Reagle: No.

Detective Murphy: We have several witnesses who said you told them it was your ex-girlfriend’s hand. Is it her hand?

John Reagle: No way! Not that I know of, anyway.

Detective Armstrong: Then why would you say that?

John Reagle: I don’t know. It made the joke funnier, I guess.

Detective Murphy: Where is your ex-girlfriend now?

John Reagle: How do I know? She left me like a month ago—with both of her hands! She left town in a hurry and didn’t tell me anything. I think she was cheating on me, but I didn’t do anything to her. I swear.

Detective Armstrong: So you just thought that would be funny? Telling everyone it was your ex’s hand?

John Reagle: Yeah.

Detective Murphy: What is her name, your ex-girlfriend?

John Reagle: Lisa Holman. She used to work at the beauty salon. I can’t remember the name. It’s on University Avenue.

Detective Murphy: So this root was just sitting there in your field for the taking?

John Reagle: No. I had to dig it out like I said.

Detective Armstrong: What did you use to dig it out with?

John Reagle: I used a post hole digger. It was the first thing handy at the time.

Detective Murphy: Do you still have it?

John Reagle: Yes, of course. Tools don’t come cheap these days,

Detective Armstrong: Since this is just all a big mix up, I guess you wouldn’t mind showing us exactly where you found your big joke?

John Reagle: No, I can show you exactly where I found it. I know my property like, well, the back of my hand.

Detective Murphy: Okay then, we’ll make arrangements. You know this is no guarantee you’ll be released, but we’ll put in a good word for you at the arraignment.

John Reagle: Look, I didn’t do anything wrong here!

Detective Armstrong: We’re going to have to let the judge decide that.

Interview ended – 8:23 a.m.